an immovable solitudeRating: 5 stars
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Length: Novel

The best I could say was that he was determined. Fractured, but not broken. And I had no idea what to do with that.

I am hesitant to present this book to you all in fear that I cannot possibly do it the justice it deserves. I’m a huge fan of SA McAuley (or Sam as she’s affectionately known).  I’ve read several of her books – some serious, some fun, some contemporary, some not so much – but they are all good. None more so than An Immoveable Solitude. This book is, by far, my favorite by this author.

Erik Hash has the world at his fingertips. He loves his life. As owner of a shark diving company in South Africa, Erik is king of his domain, doing what he’s always dreamed and loving every minute of it. The love of his life remains on land day in and day out, taking care of the everyday office needs. He has it all…until he doesn’t. Something has obviously been weighing on Kerry’s mind for a while and Erik has felt Kerry pushing him away, but he has no idea what to do about it. He marks it up to Kerry’s bleeding heart and his need to save the world, made obvious by the young man turned out by his family that Kerry has taken in and who is sleeping above the shop. And one night takes it all away.

The fire set to Erik’s shop is just the beginning. Waking up alone to find his partner has left without a trace is crushing. Finding a way to move on is the most difficult, and support comes in the form of a most unlikely source, Kerry’s sister, Kele. Kele has never been Erik’s biggest fan, but by offering Erik a position as her co-captain on a private yacht, she saves his life.

Three years later at a stop in Fiji, Erik comes face to face with the one man who broke him. And when Kerry accepts a job from the ship’s owner, Erik finds himself debating his future at sea or returning home and starting over. The connection between Erik and Kerry is not as easy to ignore as Erik once thought. Kerry’s betrayal is difficult to see past, but when tragedy strikes, Erik and Kerry face their biggest test to date and Erik is forced to make a decision: stay and fight for the man he loves or turn away and move on with his life.

I’m not sure the word angst is enough to describe the powerful emotion that emanates from this story. An Immoveable Solitude is heart wrenching down to the core. So much so that I wasn’t quite sure I would make it through the book unscathed. McAuley tells a story of love, loss, betrayal, and forgiveness in a way that is breathtaking and soul shattering. I’m still in awe of this story and I finished it days ago. The story is rich and emotional, beautiful and agonizing.

Erik was easy to love. The broken man who was betrayed by the one person he trusted and loved more than anything. Yet Erik, when he was faced with his downfalls, has no problem admitting his wrongdoing. He’s a beautifully built character – strong, forgiving, caring, and supportive. I had a harder time liking Kerry. In fact, I really wanted to dislike him. I wanted to hate him for the pain he forced on Erik. But Kerry was working through his own issues. He was young in the beginning, and even though this story is written from Erik’s POV, we get to see Kerry’s growth, his maturity in Erik’s journey. Oh, he’s definitely a broken man, but he turns that into something of determination and perseverance. In the end, I loved Kerry. He’s a very complex character. From young and fearful to mature and fearless, he becomes a contradiction in himself. A beautiful contradiction of fear and strength.

The best is the healing of this story – the beauty of confession and forgiveness. An Immoveable Solitude is a story of hope and starting over. There are so many faults in Erik and Kerry throughout this book, yet they each find a way to make them right, however long that may take. The role that each man has in the other’s healing is part of the marvel of this story.

As you can see, I absolutely loved everything about this heartbreakingly wonderful story. I love Erik and Kerry and everything they represent. Their story is one that will affect me for a long time to come. This is the second edition of this book, newly revised and edited. If you haven’t read it before, I highly recommend you read An Immoveable Solitude by S.A. McAuley. If you have read it, I imagine you probably have it on your re-read list. I know I do.

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