Rating: 4.5 stars
Buy Link: Amazon | All Romance | Amazon UK
Length: Short Story
Maybe I would dream again, that dream where he is not my brother but my lover and where it is perfectly normal to hug a man who looked just like me, but wasn’t me at all.
Michael constantly watches out for his twin brother, Gabriel. As Gabriel picks one abusive boyfriend after the other, Michael is there in the aftermath. He can’t think of dating, for no one compares to Gabriel, and of course he can’t tell Gabriel how he feels.
Gabriel has always wanted Michael. When their parents died, they huddled close in the group home never leaving the other. Gabriel loathes himself. He loathes that he thinks of Michael every day and every night. To numb himself, he finds men who are the farthest thing from his caring brother. Behind closed doors, he welcomes every physical blow inflicted on him and when that’s not enough, he find the edge of a sharp razor blade to try to numb his pain. When the door opens and his secrets are exposed, he is sure Michael will turn away from him. What happens when he realizes that his greatest desire is also Michael’s?
Let’s put this right up front. If twincest is a deal breaker for you, then there is quite possibly nothing to see here. If it’s not, well then stay with me.
This is a completely intense story focused on Michael and Gabriel. They are different in many ways, with Michael being a lifeguard and yearning for the sun, and Gabriel hidden behind leather and jeans at the bar he owns. Yet, they are the other half of each other and they each see the perfection in the other. They are both in love with each other and that is the one thing they have managed to keep hidden. The both secretly long for the other and then secretly loathe themselves because of it. Gabriel’s knows he’s reaching his breaking point and thinks, “I needed more than words could possibly express and I knew I would crave for him until my very last breath and never have my need met.” So that’s the type of writing this story is and it is what I am able to really connect with at times; there are a lot of descriptive words that put you in the moment, inside the characters’ heads, but propel the story forward at a slower pace. It’s clear what the story is leading up to, but we don’t quite know how they are going to get there.
This short story takes on a lot and Gabriel’s cutting is a catalyst that then does propel the story forward. The cutting is only dealt with on the periphery and could be another deal breaker for some readers. When the guys get together it is an intense, erotic, slightly bloody scene filled with a lifetime of longing as well as healing.
There were several secondary characters whose connections were not explained well and the storyline had the tendency to spin around itself during these interactions. But, the essence of this story completely worked for me and the brothers kept me intrigued. It is also listed as book one in a series, and that’s promising as there is so much more story to tell. Gabriel speaks from his heart when he tells Michael, “It’s natural, loving you. As easy as each beat of my heart because my heart is and always will be yours.” I’m going to recommend this book for the love story that it is.