Today I am so pleased to welcome Amy Jo Cousins to Joyfully Jay. Amy Jo Cousins has come to talk to us about her latest release, Between a Rock and a Hard Place. She has also brought along aย great giveaway. Please join me in giving AJย a big welcome!
EXPRESS YOURSELF ~ Feminine Men in LGBTQ Romance
One of the things I wanted to explore in Hard Candy (the second of the two novellas in Between a Rock and a Hard Place) was the extra layer of prejudice that exists for men who express themselves in less than stereotypically masculine ways. The POV hero of Hard Candy is Vincent Lim, an out athlete who is still looking for the approval of his parents, people who are not super comfortable with his being gay. As long as Vinnie works hard and eventually marries someone from the right kind of family, howeverโas long as he accepts the rest of their traditional expectations of himโhis parents will deal with the fact that that someone is a man.
Vinnie, of course, meets and falls for Bryan Latimer, a lip gloss-wearing dancer who loves silk robes, booty shorts, and yoga and has no time for anyone who wants him to โtone it downโ. Bryan is someone who has already been through the fire in his youth, and has come out the other side determined to be true to himself. He is not at all the type of man Vinnie ever expected to be with and Vinnieโs missteps in their developing relationship are legion.
In Hard Candy, Vinnieโs main challenge is to get past some of his own internalized prejudice. While he believes himself to be supportive of gay men of all kinds, it turns out that Vinnie is really only intellectually okay with all the ways gay men may choose to present themselves. He is still suffering from being raised in a family that heavily emphasized “appropriate” behavior and his own negative reactions to Bryanโs flamboyant style catch him off guard. Getting to know Bryan and witnessing some of the harassment Bryan experiences is an eye-opener for Vinnie, whose own life involves much less personal experience with prejudice.
As much as it may be acceptable today for rock stars to wear guyliner and for movie starsโ kids to sport skirts for couture fashion houses, for the average gay man, life is still more likely to slap you in the face if your gender expression leans toward the feminine. And itโs not a problem limited to gay men. Because our culture as a whole devalues anything associated with femininity, all men are more likely to suffer pushback from society if they expressive themselves in stereotypically feminine ways, regardless of how they identify.
As the mother of a young son, I am deeply invested in making sure that my kid and his friends, the boys and the girls, grow up feeling okay with expressing themselves in whatever ways they choose. And I think theyโre well on their way. At my sonโs birthday party last year, the mixed boy-girl group was playing with an iPad app that let them take pictures of each other and draw funny stuff on top of the images. At one point, one of the boys mock-threatened another boy, โDonโt do that or Iโll draw you in a dress!โ Before I could blink, a third boy said, โDonโt be sexist. Thereโs nothing wrong with wearing a dress.โ
So I think weโre getting there. Canโt wait to see the stories weโll be reading!
I would love to see more feminine men represented in LGBTQ romance, because anything that fucks with binaries is all right by me. Some of my favorite books in this vein include:
- Solace Amesโs The Submission Gift, a diverse, kinky, poly romance with a sometimes-feminine bi guy.
- Fae Sutherlandโs Gambling on Maybe, a light-hearted novella about Zach, who carries a purse and loves sparkle, and a closeted cop.
- Edie Danfordโs Uncovering Ray has a titular character who plays with gender expression via makeup and clothes.
- KA Mitchellโs Eli in Bad Boyfriend is fierce in spirit, often flamboyant, and very interested in fucking with het expectations.
- Heidi Cullinanโs Winter Wonderland features a feminine gay man who has conversations about negative treatment heโs received because of that.
- Heidi Belleauโs Wallflower is about Bobby, who is experimenting with cross-dressing, androgyny, and other gender expressions.
Have you read a romance with a feminine man as the hero? Tell me about it! I’d love to read more.
Blurb
When friends lose the benefits, can the friendship be saved?
Love Me Like A Rock
With the right art tools, thereโs almost nothing Austin canโt make real. Except an official relationship with his best friend, rowing teammate and occasional hookup, Vinnie.
Emotional and sexual frustration fuel a spark between Austin and Sean, the nude model in drawing class. After a quick and very dirty encounter, all the reasons Austin has been waiting for Vinnie go fuzzy in his mind.
But if Austin canโt get his head and his heart on the same page, he could lose both his friend, and his lover.
Hard Candy
Vincent always assumed he and Austin would eventually end up together. But now that Austinโs in love with another man, Vinnie is at a loss.
After the worldโs most awkward one-night stand with Bryan, a dance major, Vinnie is drawn to his vibrant spirit and calm center.
Physically, the rowing jock and the glittery dancer can match each other stroke for booty pop. But for the lovers to meet on common ground, theyโll have to find a way to get moving in the same direction.
Warning: Contains a pushy cox, an uptight rower, a rock-steady rock geek, and a dancer who looks fabulous in a skirt. The difference between friends with benefits and just friends is easier to figure out when tent sex and yoga lessons are on the line.
Bio
Amy Jo Cousins writes contemporary romance and erotica about smart people finding their own best kind of smexy. She lives in Chicago with her son, where she tweets too much, sometimes runs really far, and waits for the Cubs to win the World Series.
Giveaway
Amy Jo has brought a copy of Between a Rock and a Hard Place to give away to one lucky reader. Just leave a comment at the end of the post to enter. The contest ends on Thursday, Marchย 31st at 11:59 pm EST.
- By entering the giveaway, youโre confirming that you are at least 18 years old.
- Winners will be selected by random number.ย No purchase necessary to win. ย The number of eligible entries received determines the odds of winning.
- If you win, you must respond to my email within 48 hours or another winner may be chosen. Please make sure that your spam filter allows email from Joyfully Jay.
- Winners may be announced on the blog following the contest. By entering the contest you are agreeing to allow your name to be posted and promoted as the contest winner by Joyfully Jay.
- Prizes will be distributed following the giveaway either by Joyfully Jay or the person/organization donating the prize.
- All book prizes are in electronic format unless otherwise specified.
- By entering you are agreeing to hold Joyfully Jay harmless if the prize or giveaway in some way negatively impacts the winner.
- Readers may only enter once for each contest. ย Duplicate entries for the same giveaway will be ignored. In the event of technical problems with the blog during the contest, every effort will be made to extend the contest deadline to allow for additional entries.
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I love love love the landlord/lady in John Inman’s Belladonna books. ย Another character is trans but that is another issue altogether. ย His books are a must buy asap for me. ย If you haven’t read any of them please do, you won’t be sorry. ย
Thank you for the rec! I’m on Amazon right now, checking these books out and they look right up my alley. ๐
I’ve read several, including Bad Boyfriend (I loved Eli). One of my favourites is Snap, by JL Merrow. Jude Biggerstaff is out and proud and such a likeable character!
Thank you for the giveaway, Amy. I love your books!
Oh, I love Jude! He’s a terrific character, as is his BFF, who I totally wanted a book about. ๐ Thank you for reminding me, and for loving the books!
Thanks so much for sharing. I definitely think it’s great when people buck tradition or stereotypes. I love some of the books you mentioned, Bad Boyfriend and Winter Wonderland being on the top of the list. Another book with a feminine/flamboyant character would be Tara Lain’s Knight of Ocean Avenue.ย
I see that Tara Lain book a lot in the Also Boughts on Amazon, so obviously I should be giving it a look. ๐ Thanks for the rec!
Loving Jay by Renae Kaye is the first one that pops into my head. Loved that book. ๐
I haven’t read that one. *puts it on the TBR* Thank you!
I can’t speak to original fiction at the moment, but there are many nuanced & wonderful interpretations of Kurt Hummel (played by Chris Colfer) on the fanfic side of the Glee fandom.
Ooh, I only just got into fanfic last year, when I started reading Lisa Henry’s Teen Wolf fics. (Which are fabulous, btw, and I’ve never even seen the show.) I’ll have to check them out! Thanks. ๐
Thanks for the great post and the bit of hope for those of us who are also trying to raise kids without the traditional gender biases.
I am currently reading Blowing It by Kate Aaron and the MC has a strong feminine side. ย And I second Loving Jay – one of my favorite books.
And, I really enjoyed the previous books in your series – looking forward to reading these next two novellas.
It’s tough sometimes, because there’s still such an overall enforcement of traditional gender roles. I have friends and family who totally get it, and others who are wonderful people, but don’t. I’ve had to stop people who wanted to police my kid’s showing of emotions, wearing a kiddie tiara at a NYE party, liking a Three Mustketeers Barbie, etc. And all of those people would call themselves feminists, but it’s hard to move past our own ingrained assumptions.
I’m definitely going to check out the Aaron book. Thanks for the recs! And the compliments. ๐
I love Eli from Bad Boyfriend. Awesome post and I liked that you took a tackle against gender bias. It kind of annoys me when people I know are told they shouldn’t act or wear something because of their gender.
Me too. ๐ Thank you!
In addition to Jay, Renae Kaye has written another wonderful character with a strong feminine side: Lee from You Are the Reason.
Cool! Thank you for the rec! I’ll be checking it out. ๐
Thank you so much for Bryan! I adore characters who can be feminine while challenging the submissive role that usually goes with it (not that there is anything wrong with taking a submissive role, I’m just always so very happy when it’s not the automatic, unthinking default for all femme characters). You Are The Reason, by Renae Kaye has a delightfully femme MC called Lee. Lovely Lee was so fierce and convincingly feminine in his dolled-up splendor that he had our other MC, Dave, questioning his own gay orientation! Hee hee! Hooray for the Power Femmes!
Power Femmes! I love it. And yes, I do think there is a tendency to write feminine gay/bi men as submissive, and often physically smaller too. It’s such a strong influence, that belief that anything associated with being female means weak, small, less powerful. I’m always excited to find stories that upend that idea, too. ๐ Thanks for the rec!
Please count me in. Thanks.
Thanks for an informative post! I wish I could think of an example to share with you, but I’m currently drawing a blank. I’ve enjoyed all of this series and am looking forward to reading these two latest books.
Thank you! ๐
Thirding on Jay from Loving Jay. And these comments are making me wanting to read Bad Boyfriend, not as much as I want to read Between a Rock and a Hard Place, of course.ย
LOL. Of course. ๐ I might have reread Bad Boyfriend, for the 10th time, right after writing this post…
I adore reading about the more flamboyant characters out there, even if they are sadly rare. A recent favorite is one of the DRitC stories: Mr Wonderful by Willow Scarlett.
I didn’t read that one! Thanks for the rec!
Thanks for sharing the story about your son and his friends. I see much of the same with my own children, they are much more open and aware than me and my friends were in the 80’s and early 90’s. The novella sounds good and interesting. I like diverse characters, male as well as female.
It’s amazing to me how much more my kid knows about so many things than I did growing up. I’m very impressed with his generation. ๐
I like reading about characters from all different kinds of backgrounds. I really liked characters from S.J.D Peterson’s Plan B & Heidi Cullinan’s Tough Love. I’d really love it if guys were more able to freely express themselves in RL without fear of being harmed or bullied.
YES. I loved Chenco from Tough Love so much. He was a great character! And I’m happy to see more young guys being a lot more comfortable with femininity, although I probably see more of that living in a liberal urban area than I would elsewhere.