I am sitting here tonight in shock, trying to process Ethan Day’s passing. As many of you know, Ethan was a long-time romance author. But he was so much more than that. To many people, Ethan was part of the foundation of our community — author, publisher, GRL organizer, and friend. He was hysterical (and wrote hysterical books), but also kind and warm and friendly. There was just a spark about Ethan that drew people in and just reading so many comments on Facebook makes it clear how many lives he touched.

Truly it seems impossible to imagine that he is gone. I just saw him at GRL a month ago. I spoke with him by email a couple of weeks ago. We talked about his latest book, we made plans for GRL next year. Ethan is scheduled for a guest post on the blog next week. I have his number on my phone. It just seems inconceivable that this man who was part of my life for eight years is suddenly just gone. I keep having this slide show playing in my mind of conversations we had, of pictures we took together, of silly things that happened. Like many people who knew and loved him, it seems just impossible to believe he is gone.

This year at GRL I had a thought about the friends we make in this community. It occurred to me, as I reunited with good friends, that many people I care deeply about in the romance world are people I only see many once or twice a year. It seems impossible to believe that we only have a handful of days in person together a year, and the rest is all online contact. And yet, somehow we form bonds that feel so strong and real, bonds that can be just as important as with the people in our everyday lives. It made me realize that despite only seeing many of my friends annually, there is still a deep connection. And Ethan was one of those friends. His loss feels so profound and I can’t even imagine what it will be like not talking to him or seeing him online or chatting with him at a conference.

There is so much more I could say, but I am still kind of in shock. His loss will be felt deeply in this community and we are lucky for the time he touched our lives. I hope you guys had a chance to know him, even if only through his books. Hug your friends and family and much love to you all.

P.S. If anyone would like to share thoughts about Ethan, please feel free to include them below


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