my december daddy coverRating: 3.75 stars
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Length: Novel

 

Matthew Angel is 41 years old and finally taking steps to find himself and better understand what he wants from his life. Matthew grew up in a religious household and he knew he could never tell his parents he was gay. His past sexual experiences have been all centered around shame and punishing himself. But now that this parents have passed away, Matthew is finally ready to really explore sex and relationships, though he doesn’t know quite what he wants. That is until he stumbles upon a kink convention at his hotel and sees a poster for a charity auction. Erik Garner is offering up a Christmas Daddy/boy experience and suddenly Matthew realizes just how much he is longing for this type of connection; he sees the pictures of Erik’s past boy and knows he wants that for himself. So Matthew surprises himself by throwing caution to the wind and bidding on the experience and finds himself winning.

Erik is still recovering from the breakup with his last boy who left him for someone else. Part of Erik feels like it is his job to help his boys find their real path, even if that means leaving him. But he is also hurt and afraid to try again, so he has been avoiding even kinky hookups ever since. However, when a friend encourages him to participate in the auction, Erik agrees, figuring a one-day experience will let him figure out if he is ready for casual Daddy/boy encounters, as he knows he is not cut out for another relationship. Erik can admit to being surprised when he meets Matthew to plan their time together. Erik is used to younger boys who are just starting out their adult lives, and Matthew is older than Erik. But even from their initial conversations, it is clear how good a fit a Daddy/boy dynamic is for Matthew, and Erik is drawn to him in ways that surprise him.

When the men get together for their Christmas day and night together, it is better than either one could have expected. Matthew quickly realizes that this is what he is meant for. Even more, Erik is exactly the type of man he has always wanted. Erik seems to understand Matthew and what he needs — and definitely gives it to him. It is not only a sexual awakening for Matthew, but an awakening of the kinky boy inside of him. But Matthew also knows Erik has been clear this is only a one-off experience, and as much as Matthew would love to make it more, he has to accept what Erik is offering. For his part, Erik is shocked by how much he wants Matthew, with how perfect things are between them. Matthew takes so naturally to being a submissive and they are such a perfect fit. But Erik has loved and lost before and he doesn’t want to go through that again. Matthew has been so brave, opening himself up to a new experience and trusting Erik with the deepest parts of himself. Now, Erik needs to figure out if he can be brave in return, take things further with Matthew, and risk a loss for a chance of something amazing.

My December Daddy is a kinky holiday romance featuring a younger Daddy/older boy and a lot of first experiences. Unlike many of the other kink-heavy books I have read by Leta Blake where the kink played along with the larger storyline, the plot here is pretty much all about this Daddy/boy Christmas experience, so this one is very intensely focused on the kink side of things. Here we have an experienced, if somewhat wary, Daddy in Erik. He has had a few long-term relationships and, each time, his boy has moved on without him. Part of Erik is resigned to the idea that his role is to help guide a boy to becoming who he is meant to be, which means ultimately leaving him. But the other part of him is hurt by the losses and afraid of repeating them again. So he is looking for something casual with Matthew, a way to see if he can dip his toes back into Daddy/boy kink without going all in with his heart. For Matthew, he has never even experimented with all the things he wants, and he is coming at this as someone new to kink, to sex, and to relationships. The fact that he is older than Erik is also something both men need to work through, as it is not the dynamic they expected. But it becomes clear very fast that these guys are meant for one another and are a perfect fit. Maybe too perfect, honestly, as it is almost just too good to be true how wonderfully in sync these guys are at every moment, especially considering they just met and Matthew is basically new to every aspect of this. But the sweetness and touch of idealism fits nicely with the holiday-themed story, so I could go with it.

As I said, lots of kink here as the men try to cram a whole experience into basically 24 hours (though a snowstorm means their time together gets extended). This one is high heat with lots of sex scenes, and even when they aren’t having sex, the men are often thinking or talking about it. This is a long book and it did get to be a lot for me after a while, though overall I enjoyed the intimacy between them and the way this experience really allows Matthew to better understand what he wants and needs. The guys play with some shame kink, as Matthew has a lot of internalized homophobia and this allows him to release some of that. There are times it feels like a whirlwind, with so much intense stuff happening in such a short time. Erik notes he really is moving too fast some of the time, as he is just overwhelmed with the feelings he has for Matthew. So as I said, this one is intense and the sexual exploration really guides the story. I will say not all of it was to my taste. There is more focus than I personally enjoyed on the intimacy of giving one another enemas. The men also decide to call Matthew’s anus a “bussy” (as in “boy pussy”). Not just during dirty talk, but in their own heads. For example, “Flipping me onto my stomach, he eats my bussy…”. I’ll admit that one didn’t work for me at all and kept pulling me out of the story every time I heard it, but this is totally a personal thing and your mileage very much may vary.

While the story is very sexy heavy and focused on the Daddy/boy experience, it also addresses some larger issues for each of the men. Erik has to come to terms with his fears about abandonment and being willing to take a chance and be brave in the face of new possibilities. It contrasts nicely with Matthew’s own bravery in facing something so unfamiliar, but claiming what he wants. Matthew has a lot of internalized homophobia and shame, given his upbringing, and his time with Erik lets him really confront that. So I liked that the story covers some serious issues for both men and we see some growth from each of them.

This one is a long book and I did find it a little slower at times. It is broken into four sections: meeting to get to know one another and prepare for their experience; the Christmas experience itself; the remaining days when they are snowed in; and the aftermath. I liked that Blake shows Matthew and Erik really taking time to explore what they want together before they get to the actual scenes. And I appreciated that there is a lot of time spent making sure things are going the way Matthew wants, as well as helping to teach him more about kink, rather than throwing him in the deep end. But there is a lot of talking and explaining, which felt like too much over the length of the book. They guys also rehash the same issues over and over, mostly in their own heads, but again, it was a lot. It also felt like we get so much detail about everything they say and do. It feels like nothing about their time together happens off page. Every meal, every shower, every conversation, every activity seems to be shown. We experience almost everything along with them, and I just didn’t need it all. I do think this sense of experiencing so much alongside the characters adds to the intensity and the immersive feel of the story. But given that the plot isn’t super complex, I found it just slowed the book down for me.

In the end, I found this one enjoyable, with a nice intensity and a lot of heat. I think things could have been streamlined in places to keep up the pacing, but overall, I found this one engaging. Matthew and Erik are a sweet couple and it is nice to see them each find their happiness together.

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